The "Before Career" Report
** UPDATED Friday, MARCH 23rd, 2007 by Xero himself
xfetus@gmail.com

Just to be thorough I had to include these for the record 
but my memories are gone and the shows just weren't documented properly.


** Christmas 1986/7/8/???, San Diego, CA

** Waaaay back in 198Xish, give or take, my family lived in
** 'BEAUTIFUL' San Diego, California. I finished grade 6 at
** Ocean Beach Elementary and started grade 7 at
** Correia Junior High School.  2nd quarter of grade 7 I joined
** the Concert 'Rock' Band.  Having signed up [basically] a semester
** late that year I got 'stuck' with the stand up bass.
** I wanted to play something bowed but had to play pizicatto
** as to 'free up' a bow for the cello section.
** Come X-Mas time the Correia Jr. High School Concert 'Rock' Band
** plays an X-Mas 'revue' [even]. 
** Because the instrument was TWICE my size, I sat on a,
** "This chair be high, says I!!!" style stool in the middle of the
** very back row, TOWERING over the rest of my peers. 
** [or so it seemed to me.]

** The only song title I can remember from the songs I learned
** and played as the Correia Jr. High School Concert 'Rock' Band
** bass player is a little ditty called:

**                 "MISTER FOO, GOES BLUE"

** AND I can still play it!!!  [The main riff, anyways...]


** ???? 199X Lakeshore Catholic High School, Port Colborne, ON
** Maybe grade 10 but probably grade 11

** Some band, whose name I can't even remember 
** [Velvet Spriral?? Pickle Knuckle??? Smakestack Lampshade????]
** and had gotten the gig because they "'featured' Leslie Vernooy's
++ older brother's half-roommate-in-law" or such, played an LCHS
** dance one year.  The song these geeks chose at their 'big show'
** to ask an audience member to sing was:

**       FAITH NO MORE's "EPIC."

** Mike Schaerer jumped onstage and [apparently] blanked as they
** started the song and grabbed me by my shirt [standing in the
** front row] and screamed in my ear, "OH SHIT!! WHAT THE HELL
** ARE THE WORDS, J?"
** I screamed the 1st verse and chorus with him holding the mic
** from the floor, then took it [the mic] outright from him,
** hit the stage and proceeded to finish the song proper, 
** much to the delight of the crowd, who seemed to have responded
** THAT much louder [from stage, as it were]


** August 1992 [+/- a fortnight at either end of it]
** The LIFE LIKE JESUS Era

** And I Quote:
** "We're at Mike's Place / The little party shack"
** "We're at Mike's Place / No food to fix a snack"
** "The [BAND] is playing so loud"
** "Trash the Place going nuts"

** And [apparently] I'm "pinching butts"
** 'Nuff said...


August 1993

HER LESBIAN FRIEND debuts as a 4 piece at a party at the beautiful jenn hedger's 
house.
The set includes:  Jeb's Upstairs, Fucking Sonic, Break, Red Tape, Son Of A Gun,
Aimless Nonsense, Occifer, Breed and probably Just Like Heaven.

Ralphie Hitchcock joins to sing a cover of Ministry's Thieves with Dunx 
from Bizarre Thinking Accident on drums.

Vox/Gtr: Xero Fetus
Ld Gtr: Mr. Asshole
Bass: Rueben
Traps: Phillie Blunt


September 1993

Adding a 3rd gtr and a 'strictly' vocalist, HLF play for free in Niagara Falls'
Fireman's Park.  The sextet bust out a set that includes the above songs.

Added history:  Xero Fetus smashes 'The Tugboat Annie' gtr during set closer
Aimless Nonsense.  1st gtr sacrifice ever.

added members:
vox: Ralphie Hitchcock
3rd Gtr: Hot Lixxx


November 1993

No longer with HLF, Xero Fetus sings Fucking Sonic with what HLF evolved into,
POWER DRILL PRODIGY at a free show in Fireman's Park to easily 500 kids.


April 14th, 1995

Privately debuting th 4 piece version of MY FAVOURITE VILLAIN at Morgan Gee's
Good Friday party.  Dubbed the "Bordom At Morgan's" this started the attempted 
Good Friday tradition.

The set includes:  Nicoteenager, Popsongs, Whoremoan, Break, Floyd The Barber,
(Sunshine) Chunks and About A Girl.  
Others are played as well, some twice (like Whoremoan).

Vox/Gtr: Xero Fetus
Vox/Gtr: Random
Bass: Maverick
Traps: Sticks-O-Gold